STEPHANIE

26012012

2012-01-27T12:48:00.002+08:00

一切都会是过程。。一切都会过去的。。。。

busy busy busy busy busy ....

my history lecturer is so god damn hawt ! (;

alright .. major random ..

well...

my birthday is coming ...... yay ................... so what ?

dont really wanted to have expectation thou ..

it was major disappointment last year ... whatever ...

blsh ...

i'm so tired ..

sleep first ...

nitez ....

25012012

2012-01-25T23:14:00.002+08:00

if u see it u see it ..

if u don't .. u just dont meant to ...

tough semester ....

bring it on ..

I can do this .. c'mon ..

well ..

am craving for asam laksa ...

msia trip is rather disappointing ...

food crave hasnt been satisfied ..

oh well .. whatever ....

am now stuck with those shitty food again ..

gonna make a damn list next time ..

booo ...

stressed ...

untitled #4

2012-01-24T22:58:00.007+08:00

Feelings don't die easily because we keep feeding them with memories.

That's exactly the reason why it's hard to move on.

I bet its time to stop feeding memories ? Memories almost have me killed...lying on the same bed again..everything seems to be exactly the same..the only differences is..you are not here...I'm all alone..its hard for me and its painful for me knowing that u actually don't belongs to me anymore...insomnia...thats 1 of the reasons why I hang out every single night...talking about letting go..I should have...long time ago indeed..I thought I did...really.... too much words remain unsaid/unasked...I don't know if it is too painful for me to ask or said ..or I'm trying to avoid facing the truth...It ran across my mind zillion times and they just stopped by my lips..can't help being a coward..1 year..not too long but certainly not short I would said...promises u said last year...u've broken them already....next year u said...I'm waiting...not paying too much attention or focusing on it thou..u know..it is painful and disappointing when u are expecting but it turns out to be nothing... but I will remember them...u'll prove it u said...i'm waiting...I'm dying to call/text/see u ...but I'm afraid...of what? I'm not sure...I assumed that u lied to her...I some what feel guilty...I know how much it hurts...foolish...I know....I am not even sure if u cares how I feel or so...whatever...if u want we can work things out..no point I working on nothing...but fair and square..back to basic..choices and sacrifices we are talking about...if u are not up for any sacrifices..alright..stay there..like things that u demanded will fall from the sky..whatever...it should come to an end...zillion times I've said so last year...lol..well..I need time..a super hectic year ahead before my next break..cant wait..but first of all..the challenge have just started..time to ciao...I can do it don't I ? of course I do (= ! xoxo

words...say it only when u mean it...because..I'm really serious... thankiew..xoxo

cny eve

2012-01-23T16:00:00.004+08:00

n so .. I'm back in US .. n so I'm in a confusion .. n so I cant care less..

I'm not even sure if thats about me .. but whatever ...

n so .. please be mine ? alright .. I know .. just kidding ..... not really ...

untitled #3

2012-01-18T00:54:00.000+08:00

im so mother fucking emo !!!! cb !

untitled #2

2012-01-17T01:52:00.003+08:00

我想我应该是疯了。。。。

事情应该就会告一段落了。。。。

应该。。。

i love guys who .....

2012-01-15T20:26:00.005+08:00

the last but not the least .. love me as much as I Love him

randomly came across some article like that ..

kind of interesting .. no ?

ha .. whatever ..

#piece of thought

2011-12-23T04:59:00.002+08:00

I don't know what am I actually thinking…I thought I'm but the fact is I wasn't at all…time stop for nobody…I know…but..it is really tough…tough for me at least…life..never been easier…never ever…been emo-ing…yes..I wasn't happy…at all…getting a little lost…maybe i shouldn't come back..maybe…i don't know…forget…should have…should have….I know…1 bloody year…everything still vividly in mind…guess that I'm really hurt…been trying really hard to live a good life…everything seems to be great…but there is always a hole in my heart…I know…I don't know why I wasn't happy….I just wasn't….I wish I was the one I used to be…who am I to actually give a damn ? preparing to go back to US now…what actually matter? who actually cares ?

cant find back those feelings at all…extremely sad today…

stressed….

我很执著。。。。。我知道。。。。。

i think … i wouldn't want to be back forever ……

dec 7

2011-12-06T12:27:00.006+08:00

whatdafak ?? 7th dec already ? omfg.. time flies .. I'm old ... sigh ... unlimited desire .. haha .. as usual ... money never enough to be spend .. holiday seasons .. end of semester .. finals and projects almost have me killed .. stressed to the max ... I just wanted to enjoy myself .. recharge .. after this semester ... its been a year ... finally i can have a break .. soon .. I didn't know how did I made it for 1 year straight study without break ... superb ..

talking bout changes .. I don't know if I've changed ... hope so .. to become better of course .. time past people changed ... blah .. suppose to be studying right now .. but .. just don't feel like ... finals starts tomorrow ... FTS

as I mentioned in my fb ... coincident for the once, twice, trice .. the forth ? fuck that ... are u looking down on my IQ or u are over estimating yourself ? blah .. what-so-ever ... i don't know why and I don't want to know too ..

the one thing that keep me going on right now is #homecoming ! no thing else matter much ...

long distance never gonna work out ? nah .. just not for anybody ...

its sooo sweet that you can actually like somebody for so long even though you don't know them ... maybe as they said .. things that you didn't owned will be the best forever .. I hope that things don't change forever .. let me have some faith towards love ... haha .. just saying .. things is still perfect at the moment ... lets see ..

sien max ... ciao !

lots of love ,

stephie sunshine ..

dec 4 2011

2011-12-04T14:47:00.002+08:00

december already .. its been a year ..

i cant wait to go home .....

party ... bakkutteh...currymee...mamak...movie...hangout..zouk..pavillion..etcetc .. im coming !

我。。。真的。。很懒惰解释一切。。。。。

我。。。。。很累了。。。。

真的很累。。。。

累了。。真的很希望有一个可以分担一切的人。。。。

可是。。。信任。。。变的那么的困难。。。

我讨厌这样。。。

可是。。

我又能怎样？

晚安。。。

hppy thankagiving !

2011-11-24T14:07:00.002+08:00

happy thanksgiving everyone !

winter is coming ~~ im so busy still ~~

tired max max .. corona n movie night !

will update soon ! night ! xoxo

i miss those days when i've someone to miss ~~~

the ultimate pledge of LOVE

2011-11-21T10:21:00.004+08:00

Cartier LOVE bangle

the ultimate pledge of love

1969, Aldo Cipullo

"dear my future husband , your lovely wifey me would really be pleased by this ultimate pledge of LOVE !"

xoxo

personally prefer this 18k rose gold =) my size is 18 by da way .. aha

#piece of thought

2011-11-19T15:17:00.003+08:00

my 12st birthday pressie for myself... is VEGAS ! the sin city ~ its so early ? ohhh nono .. im gonna save money and waste them like water ... so it takes me a while to save that amount .. so yea .. blah wanna tag along ? start saving money then ! see u in VEGAS baby ! ciao ~

er #justsaying by da way .. =)

paulaner,chips,movie night ! xoxo

christmas wishlist 2011 !

2011-11-19T02:53:00.003+08:00

actually I feel damn weird to post a wishlist and i want so many things lollololol so if u wanted to buy me a christmas present just ask me !! then I will tell ye ~ lol but everyone here will make up a birthday wishlist, christmas wishlist when they invite u for a party .. I dont know what do you think about it ... I kind of like that idea ... no unwanted present at least .. good ? no ? maybe u will think "sohai , why should I spend so much money on ur fuckin birthday" but well ... I don't ..

basically .. the best gift will be -------------------------------------------------------------- C A S H

haha ....

well ...

if u insists

* perfume

* north face jacket ( winter is coming so yea)

* charms , accessories

*running shoe ( my baby got stolen *sigh* )

and still cash will be the best ~~ thankiu !

#random

2011-11-18T02:07:00.002+08:00

randomly remembered I pierced my nose ... haha

no .. its not new change .. I pierced it long long time ago ...

but it seems fresh to me still =)

its thursday already ..

if i get 100 in my calculus test I will buy myself a pair of G ballerina pumps ! xoxo

piece of thought #1

2011-11-13T13:09:00.007+08:00

I know.....I know its been so many days already....just so u know I'm so busy...gah .. its the end of semester already...test,finals,quizzes,n stuffs..I'm going nuts soon i bet =[ I can't believe that its been one year already, well ~, almost, stressed max max ... seriously ..... and shits happen too as well ...

sometimes .. I'm just so lazy ,.. I am lazy of pretending and ass-asskissing n stuffs .. i don‘t know what do you think , but to me ... it is just disgusting ... and just so you know ... i'm allergy to fake people n stuffs .. you're so freaking fake so #fuckoff

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或许你觉得你现在拼命想要拥有的是你一直想要的。。可是。。。过了几年以后你会觉得这些东西毫无疑义。。这个世界很现实。。现实得恐怖。。。钱。。真的很重要。。有钱使得鬼推磨。。真的。。如果有一天你出钱也没有人帮你做事的话，原因只有一个。。你出的钱不够多而已。。。还有。。你有的钱还是要自己赚回来的。。所有关系到钱的事情都会瞬间变得很没有人情味。。。为了钱什么都可以出卖的人很多。。。我讨厌他们。。自己想要的应该自己赚回来。。我觉得。。你拥有的是你自己用自己的努力换回来的才会是永恒的。。所以。。或许现在你拥有的我没有。。可是。。以后我拥有的时候你或许已经失去。。而且我会继续的拥有。。。拼命地寻找理由来让你自己好过，不会改变现实，承认别人真的比你好比你有钱，可是更加要相信你会比他好。。只是时间的问题而已。。只有努力才会改变一切。。。我知道。。每个人都会有不同的要求。。当然。。选择始终是你的。。。你爱就好 ♥

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请珍惜你所拥有的，所有的东西都是得来不易。。。真的。。只有经历过才会懂得那种感觉。。。才会学会。。。我真的不知到你到底在想什么。。。你真的过分了。。我真的生气了。。。你。。。也许只有失去了一切才会学会珍惜。。。我不想说什么也不懂要说什么。。。

－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－

off to study ! ciao ! 2 test tomorrow !! goood luck !

3th nov 2011

2011-11-03T14:27:00.002+08:00

又不是我的错。。我为何要道歉？

现在是只有你有情绪吗？

i dont have time to blog ! gonna sleep now ..

I half done with my laundry ! yay !

but

i've 4 essay assignments and 1 presentation due on friday ..

fuck that ~

1 november 2011

2011-11-02T13:00:00.002+08:00

i wanted to blog .. but im so tired .. bare with me please .. i will blog tomorrow ... nitez ..

so busy so busy

who want to tidy my room n do laundry for me ?

Im too busy with school stuffs ~~~ gah !

start from tomorrow .. k ?

and i cant believe that it is november already TnT

24 oct 2011

2011-10-24T15:41:00.005+08:00

halloween sneak peek ! I might change my mind anyway .. bunny for now ..

its been another week already, I cant believe that .. time flies, especially when you're busy.. brief update of me ...

been super duper busy ..... my English prof. is just so freaking stupid .. I hate her .. been doing quite ok with school stuffs .. Just da English class .. stupid enough ... Halloween is around the corner .. this weekend in fact .. lol .. still searching for costume anyway .. gah .. time to sleep .. so much going on ... and so im so gonna pass my freaking midterm with flying colors... to anyone that say i'm impossible .. hello .. im gonna tell u that I'M POSSIBLE .. as always .. u idiot .. stop judging me .. boo boo .. still working on my abs nyway .. its getting cold now ... which means laziness .. so lazy to hit da gym.. by nyway ... I have my secret goal .. which I wont tell u before i achieve it .. so .. yea .. stay tune .. n regrets n guilt is hunting me sometimes over some stupid stuffs I did .. boo .. people make mistake dont they ? well ~ alright .. move on .. time stop for nobody .. nobody ! aite ... this week is so gonna be productive .. gayao ! I hope so .. LOL ciao ! good luck steph =)

I do it because I wanted to, because I needed to, because I had to, but mainly because you said I couldn't.

If you're not pushing yourself beyond the comfort zone, you're not demanding more from yourself.

I'm possible

oct 20

2011-10-20T12:36:00.001+08:00

我很忙很忙很忙很忙！！！！！！

我很讨厌我的英文老师。。。

啊～～～～～～

杀了我吧～～～～～

ello bello yello october 19

2011-10-10T08:38:00.003+08:00

hello lil fockers ! (I just watched this movie again) LOL is been another damn week already, how are you guys doing ? I'm dead busy and still the busyness is going to continue and continue and continue..until the day i'm dead I bet *sigh* life is short, no doubt..too short that you have to plan everything ahead so that you don't messed up with anything..sometimes it is really hard to make an decision too early as you don't know what will actually workout at the end of the day..so yea..decision making is never easy..never ever...it is like a bet..chances are things gonna workout or messed up..but..they say don't ever regret for what you've chosen..so I better make my decision carefully.. aha .. said is easier than done.. always ... *sigh*

I'm ambitious....Aggressive indeed....and I've strong ego...I can't afford to lose...the good thing, I will get what I want once I make up my mind...which will lead me toward success...and the bad thing is, I push myself real hard sometimes..that I'm really stressed out sometimes.. =[

people who say they like you when they don't even spoke to you before is #gross eww.. as I grow older .. I believe lesser in love..becoming more and more realistic..for me, no one (beside family) is more dependable than myself..nothing is greater and more satisfying than what I get by my very own self...I know what are you thinking .. but c'mon .. be frank to yourself..deep inside you..you are realistic...all I ever wanted to say is ... for every girl that are this way .. there is someone or some reason that make her that way ... walk in my shoes then only you give me comment ... =]

shocked still.. but .. whatever it is... I'm good ... good luck girl ... =) u're screwed ... deep inside my heart .... I really wanted to tell u that for the very last time "fuck you cb!" =) I promised myself... I'm absolutely done with this shit ... what a loser are u ... boo ... get a life !!

*save money ! money money home ! 10 k pls

*good grades / built up my career

* nothing matter much to me now ... working real hard onstudies / money / looking good / good future

I really miss my family very much out of a very sudden =*(

loves , Stephanie SunShine ♡

october 5 11'

2011-10-05T13:39:00.002+08:00

hard work being paid off .. yay ~~ 101 % =) jealous me .. aha .. still long way to go .. more to come .. hope everything will be good *cross finger* just called mom and dad .. oh man .. this woman rocks .. eheh .. love her =) n my dad too ..

motivated ~ recharged ~ warm ~ I miss you guys ♥

is been a year ... how's everyone doing ? i've been trying real hard to be better ... 3 last month for this year ... do something before this year end if u havent done any yet ... or else .. ur 2011 will be wasted ... =)

think big .. my mom said ... aha .. I do ... but she never know ... she never know her daughter me is a fantastic dreamer ... If I want , I will , no matter what ... the law of attraction .. I dont know if u believe in it .. I do .. and it works .. i think .. LOL .. noting is impossible .. make it happen .. be extraordinary ... or ... like everyone else .. u choose .. (; good luck peeps ~

nights ♥ sunny sunshine !

听说你过得不是很好。。。。。。。希望一切会好起来。。 =)

annual breakdown

2011-10-03T12:55:00.003+08:00

breakdown ... we don't just breakdown .. there's always a reason why..

someone breakdown very often,someone don't. If you do,congrats , you don't have so much emotional burden like I do. I don't breakdown often, so when I breakdown once in a blue moon its gonna be a disaster. Had a fun -> angry -> sad -> breakdown -> drunk -> crashed night .It is a night full of tears..I think all of my tears done flowing for just this night..LOL.. It's time to sober up and continue my life. Feels so good after breakdown, it's the 1st time of the year if I'm not mistaken. Freaking 9 months of accumulated emotional burdens. Maybe , I'm just too not optimistic..maybe..I'm so tired of my life,well~ sometimes. Freedom being abused is a disaster..fuck this..I know..I understand too..We have to do things that is correct and to know what we suppose to do..fight for a better life in future,meeting all the expectation from all the people around us..etc etc so called correct stuffs.. But .. sometimes people just need a break.. I concluded myself as a good person..maybe overall acceptable.. I dont know what do u think .. but there's a better chances that I dont even care..

I study hard, Gym hard , trying to be active in college, Earn for myself, afford myself, knowing my future plan, don't do stuffs that hurts people .. what else do I need to do to be a "good" student/daughter/friends/ or simply a 19 year old girl ? I dont know. I am absolutely open-minded to make changes to be better. I always do. so I'm not being self-satisfied and gonna stay like this forever. Feel free to give me comment, appreciated. Better than u stabbing my back saying those things that you dont even know if it is true. Most of the time those stupid things is just being made-up because of ur stupid jealousy and insecurities. Dont do that please, it makes u ugly.... really ...

Gah..What-so-ever ! life goes on .. never look back ... c'mon steph !

I've so freaking much things to do ... pls kill me now ... sigh ~

sept 30

2011-09-30T12:57:00.002+08:00

常会听说“我相要一个有钱，有车，家庭背景良好，长得高，长得帅 etetc 的男朋友”。

没错，话的确是这样说的。

可是，说归说。有钱有车高且帅的，我未必喜欢。

感觉啊。。真的。。比一切来得重要。。

至少。。我是这样想的。。。

至少。。还是。。

test prep in process ! 29th sept 2011

2011-09-29T14:22:00.002+08:00

2.30 am .......................

4.30 am ! nitez ! =( im so dead .. i know ...damn it ..

sept 28th 2011

2011-09-28T12:18:00.004+08:00

oh man .. are u serious ? 28th sept ? really ?? omfg .. time past real fast..its been 9 months.. how're ye my homiess ? well .. been really busy...focusing on my studies n gym like freaking much...life is a bitch they said..indeed...I'm keeping myself real busy..else.I will think shit again..love love love love love..its all about love .. hahahah...fuck it..seriously..exhausted..no faith remain..disappointed.. real love ? nah !

who need love now ? who need a man ? come on ... "if u cant be happy by urself,u cant be happy with him either"

common ! life"s tooo short ! nothing is impossible and just do it ! no regret no what if ! boo ! go go go steph ! (;

well.. something I wanna talk about too as well..I cant believe that there is really someone on earth that are that confident about themselves..I mean really...fuck it...gross to da maximum..."you know u like me !! come on admit it u miss me" what ? really ? sohai enough...well nothing much...am just feeling extremely annoyed by this.. boo.. #fuckoff oh boy u've no idea about me..stop ur sohai-ness if u could..thanks ...

I miss home..family and mua friends..all in all I miss Malaysia...homesick to da max.. =*( wanna go home *sob sob*

-OCTOBER GOALS

* save money ( as usual I'm always broke )

* Abs training

* be more organized

* tidy my stuffs !!!!!

* a lil improvement in studies

*get my blog active again .. hahaha

ciao , loves , sunny sunshine ! =)

九月二十三日

2011-09-24T04:44:00.003+08:00

人生本来就是苦多於乐。
你的开心，有太多人可以和你分享，不一定要是情人，
如果日子过得快乐，自己一人也可以很好，
悲伤，却不是很多人可以和你分担。
你愿意把悲伤告诉他的，他才是你最想亲近和珍惜的人。。。。。。♥

我的他。。你听到了吗？

我要的。。。。其实只是一个可以分担我的悲伤的人。。。

~~*STEPHANIE*~~

26012012

25012012

untitled #4

cny eve

untitled #3

untitled #2

i love guys who .....

#piece of thought

dec 7

dec 4 2011

hppy thankagiving !

the ultimate pledge of LOVE

#piece of thought

christmas wishlist 2011 !

#random

piece of thought #1

3th nov 2011

1 november 2011

24 oct 2011

oct 20

ello bello yello october 19

october 5 11'

annual breakdown

sept 30

test prep in process ! 29th sept 2011

sept 28th 2011

九月二十三日

STEPHANIE